Hints For Outdoors Campers

Robert Strand

bearonmountainAre you one of those people who love the outdoors, hiking, fishing, hunting, and camping. You know, getting back to nature. The following are some hints for all of you out-doorsy types:

  • Get even with a bear who raided your food bag by kicking his favorite stump apart and eating all those juicy ants.
  • A hot rock placed in your sleeping bag will keep your feet warm. A hot enchilada works almost as well, but the cheese sticks between your toes.
  • When camping, always wear a long-sleeved shirt because it gives you something to wipe your nose on. And remember, a two-man, or two-woman pup tent does not include two men or two women or even a pup.
  • A potato baked in the coals for an hour makes an excellent veggie...but a potato baked in the coals for three hours makes an excellent hockey puck.
  • Take this simple test to see if you qualify for solo camping. Shine a flashlight into one ear...if the beam shines out the other ear, do not go into the woods alone.
  • In emergency situations such as getting lost, you can survive in the wilderness by shooting small game with a slingshot made from the elastic waistband of underwear.
  • AND the next time you go camping...remember to always take a well developed sense of humor along with your tent, sleeping bag and lots of grub! A camper without a sense of humor is like a car without a bumper.
  • AND MOST OF ALL...when in the outdoors, always remember to give thanks and praise to the Creator who made this wonderful, exciting, beautiful and bountiful world!

"And God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it He rested from all the work of creating that He had done" (Genesis 2:2).